Tuesday, August 4, 2009

[ scared ]

How's that for the title of a post? I ordered this book after seeing it on several blogger friends' pages. Talk about a page turner! There's even a sticker on the front of my book that says if you did not find this book a good read you can return it. I've never read a novel that has brought me to tears so many times. I'm such a sap lately and my heart is torn for orphans and children of the world. This book is enlightening and heartbreaking. Something I'm glad I read, but at the same time it feels like something I don't ever want to read again, but it must be shared. Thank you Tom Davis. I hope this book touches 1000's of hearts and moves them to act.

After my trip to Haiti I've never been the same. Eric and I even had this conversation just yesterday. I feel like I've lost my mind at times, and he said he can see the change in me. I'm not the same person. And just when I feel like I've become a disappointment in some way he says it. "I can see Christ in you now." Am I not the luckiest woman in the world? At one point in our lives, when I had lost sight of what truly mattered to me and my family as a whole, I thought Eric had lost his mind. Thought he had gone crazy and had become one of those 'born again bible thumpers'. I told him yesterday I was sorry for that. Sorry for ever thinking he was nuts. Because now I understand. Now I see what he sees. Knowing Christ is one thing, thinking you have him in your heart, knowing who he is and why He came to save us. It's not enough. Having him in your heart is amazing. He's been in my heart for YEARS. But the moment He takes hold of your heart with both hands and begins to dwell in you is indescribable.

At one point in the book Scared there is a line that talks about going through the motions. Are we really living the way God wants us to, living like Christ...helping where we can help, doing works. Or are we just going through the motions. Looking like good Christians. Attending church on Sunday, saying grace before our meals and then going about our business like any other day. I don't want to just be going through the motions. I want to live the Red Letters. Sometimes it's a struggle, and I have to push myself. Go the extra mile to do for someone who I may not think they should be so worthy. I have to rely on God to help me see those days through, but I want to be a change in the world.

This book is incredible.

"A fire burns in me to do what I can. Though I am but one man, I will not stop trying."

Something new at church is being driven to believe in the impossible. What are my dreams. My dreams that can only be fulfilled with God. Where is He leading me and how will I follow? One of my God dreams is to be a change in the world. To open others' eyes to helping orphans and families in need. Wether it's around the world or in my backyard. It's a change I'm driven to everday. I have so many plans, so many dreams I want to see fulfilled. What are your God-sized dreams? I hope you'll take time to check out this book and see how those dreams and ideas may be changed.

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