I went to bed thinking I might read for a while, then I thought 'no, I'll skip my reading tonight and spend my time praying.' I always say a prayer before I go to bed, and encourage my children to do the same. When they were little we said prayers with them, and then it's more of something you hope you instilled in them to continue, rather than push them towards. I know they still say prayers, but sometimes I wonder if it's an everyday thing or just once in a while. I ask Tanner the other night when I tucked him in, "Did you say your prayers?" "Yes, Mom." "Really? When was the last time you said them?" (expecting him to say two minutes ago--his answer for anything in the past these days). Instead he surprised me. "I said them yesterday, Dad helped me when he tucked me in." Still teaching them, that's our job. :)
So, last night I was on a mission. I'd read so many things I wanted to share with God. It's like a warm-up to always start with the things I'm thankful for, my overflowing of His amazing blessings I find in my family, friends, children, husband, my everyday life providing me food and shelter. You get the idea. Thanking Him most of all for my salvation and Jesus. It still overwhelms me and amazes me that someone would share so much in giving their only son just for little 'ole me. Could you do the same? I know I couldn't. I have two boys and no one I know is worth as much as them. No one on this earth that is. Blah blah blah...you're getting the idea right?
Then I start on the 'important' stuff.
- I've read friends' blogs where some are beginning their fundraising efforts for adoption (I seriously want a new shirt!), praying for their success with their efforts and wishing they surpass their goals.
- Another blogger that is an advocate for several people's adoptions, just giving to any in need because it's what her heart is lead to do. After her own adoptions and knowing the need she's reaching out and sharing with others who are called by God to follow the same dream of adoption. What an incredible woman. Her family has vowed to eat rice and beans for a month to save money and send it to others who need it more than they do. I pray that this will be such a valuable lesson to her children that they will grow in her example and God will bless her and allow her to reach so many others.
- I begin to pray for people I've been told are now battling cancer. Something I can only imagine the toll it takes on a body, mind and spirit and pray that children are not left without mothers due to this terrible affliction.
- I pray for the Orphanage in Canaan where Bobi lives and for God to bless the children and the work she's doing there and the new relationship she's building. What a blessing! I think we all have mommy goggles when it comes to Bobi and want to care for her like she's ours.
- I remember praying for the mission and everyone related to it. The new relationships growing there. The happiness of leaders and strength to build the mission and grow.
- I prayed for the new organization that I found through Tom Davis and the book I'm reading "Red Letters". I 'stumbled upon' 5 for 50 (stumbled...yeah right), and discovered what $5 dollars can do. Five dollars. F-I-V-E! It boggles the mind when I think of the money people spend on various things when so little can do so much for people in other countries. God's people. Go ahead, I dare you..... spend $5.
- I prayed for Kelly Putty after reading her latest post about returning to Africa. I pray for her safety, and for her group's safety. Travel mercies and that they will share the love of God and teach the people they encounter about the sacrifice of Jesus. To help the children, feeding them, loving them, keeping them safe. Building a life for them, finding families for them. Oh how I wish I could go with her.
- And then I started praying about adoption. That neverending battle in my mind. What's His plan for me and this thing that tugs at my heart. This prayer turns into a conversation, asking questions, making statements and my mind takes off and I don't remember when I fell asleep or what I actually got out or what my last 'waking' thoughts were. I just remember feeling a void when I woke that I left something unfinished. It will never be finished. I wait everyday to understand, to have it make sense. Yet I'm greatful for the many people God has called to follow through with this thing called adoption and the many MANY orphans who find the love of a family.
So....have you ever fallen asleep in mid-prayer? I did. Today I'll still work on that conversation with God. He's in my heart and mind all the time. I sit and work while talking to Him, while singing songs praising Him. Maybe you'll try that tonight. Praying till you fall asleep that is.
"Therefore I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted you."